Lost Soul of a Survivor
by Airashii
Summary: Based in an alternate universe and a oc with a different veiw of SW.
1. Chapter 1

Lost Soul of a Survivor

By: Airashii

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. I do however own this story and the Original Charaters within it. Please read and review.

Chapter One: The Past Shows the Beginning

My tale begins with my origin. I don't remember if I had a family at one point of my adolescence. The only memories I can recall are sometimes blurred or lost cause of time. You will listen to my story if you wish to know the reason of my existence and the reasons I fight against the Empire.

Now I will begin to tell my tale.

I remember life at the Jedi temple very well. I was the best human female of our group the others were a bit absentminded that clouded there judgment. Our master ,Yoda, Had explained that there was something going on in the force. He told us to use our feelings and use them to sense the disturbance. I remember quite vividly one of our afternoon sessions as we younglings were about to leave our lesson that Master Yoda asked me to stay. I watched him with abit of confusion as I sat down on the ground. I was a lot more taller the master Yoda at the age of 14.

"Padme sense the disturbance you must. For great help in the future you will be." He said as he sat down in front of me. I blinked my eyes several times before I closed them. 'I sense great pain.. Anger and fear.. Master .. We younglings are in great danger.. The sith are plotting something that we cannot stop until its late..' I whispered franticly as I watched images of death and destruction. ' Lady Padme is in grave danger… Master we Cannot let her die.. I can't… She doesn't deserve the pain she will get in only the matter of months.' I added as several warm tears ran down my face.

Oh how I adored lady Padme Amidalla. She was the perfect example of joy and light the republic had to show. She found me on Tatooine afew years ago it seems she was waiting for the return of master Anakin. He seemed to have vanished to rescue his mother. I was fixing an old crop duster for Owen Lars. He promised me shelter and food till I fixed all his equipment. I was only happy to find a home.. Even if it was for a little while. It was abit strange when I saw master Skywalker for the first time. He startled me abit as I felt him. He grinned and patted my head. "Another force sensitive.. Hello young one.. What is your name?" He asked calmly the day he arrived.

I looked at him embarrassed as I wiped my face clean of the freshly left droid oil . "Padme.. Padme Star." I said proudly. I never really thought of a name till then. No one really asked but I've seen the holos in town to know what name I wanted. Padme after the woman I idolized. Star for the mystery and the light it shined on our planet. After that meeting it seemed Anakin left in search of his mother.

Padme smiled at me when I cleaned up the mess I had made in the small tool shed. That woman promised me a better life which she completed in. After her and master Skywalker left I asked the Owens' if I could stay until the lady sent a transport for me. They allowed me to stay abit grateful as if they wanted someone to fill a void left by the deceased Shimi.

The clone wars began the day before a transport was sent for me. I arrived at Corasuant welcomed by Padme with open arms. It seemed she had just returned from Naboo. I smiled brightly as I ran towards her my arms open as I hugged her tightly. How I wanted her to be my family. She looked saddened as she led me to what would be my home for the next three years. I watched confused as the great doors of the Jedi temple opened up to me. A small green creature greeted me and took my hand from Padme's. "Yoda I am. Padme.. Say farewell For Youngling is to learn. Learn she must for great things I sense in her I do." He said to both me and Padme. Padme seemed to understand and asked if she were allowed to visit. Yoda nodded as he began to lead me to my room.

"Jedi you will be. For great things I sense in you.. Future is not clouded as greatly as others. Good things I see." He added as he left me to settle in my chamber. It was a wonderful room with a nice soft bed to sleep in. it had a beautiful view of the senate building. I noticed the closet had clothing as well. My eyes sparkled as I lifted the youngling robes, light blue if I remember correctly. I changed quickly and left to roam around the building. I stumbled onto a training class. I watched intently as I saw master Windu teaching a young Padawan some form of saber.

I then left there and went to where master Yoda told me to meet him. That began my lessons. And Now I sit here describing what I saw. The pain caused tears that nearly burned down my cheeks. My friend my only true family would soon be lost to me. Master Yoda gave me afew moments to recover. "Sadness is a way to the dark side.. Avoid it you must." He warned as he stood up and left.

After that it felt like time blurred. I remember leaving the temple a few hours before the attack on it had occurred. I was on my way to visit Padme. She had left her home with out a good bye. I remember sitting on her balcony of her apartment waiting intently on her return. Her Jampor snippet was on the dresser. I tilted my head to look at it. She never left it behind it always hung from her neck on a silver chain. That image unnerved me. I went over and picked it up and placed it into my robe.

I remember falling asleep on her soft bed. It smelled of jasmine and some type of spice… A Nabooian spice maybe. It seemed I missed many things While I slept I had dreams or rather seen images as I slept death…Pain destruction…All those things i had felt I'd had seen once before with Master Yoda..

I awoke the next day to being shaken. Dorme had stains of tears on her normally cheery face. I wasn't on the Padme's bed or in the Apartment.. Or On Corasuant for that matter. I was on a Ship… I could sense the great pain everyone felt as I walked towards the familiar force auras. Master Obi Wan looked at me then kneeled down. His face seemed more lined then I last remembered. "Padme.. I am sorry…"He said sadly as he hugged me. I was confused when he said it. Master Yoda had been busy talking to Bail Organa and they both looked over at me. 'What are you hiding from me? Where's Padme…I want to see Padme..' I said softly I could feel my eyes water as I knew I felt her earlier. It seemed like she left. "Padme is in the force now.. We did all we could.. We knew how close you two were." Obi Wan told me as he turned me back to face him.

My heart felt as if it shattered. I wept with the others as I screamed that it wasn't true. That they were telling me lies.. I ran from them. I ran to where I felt Padme Leave me. She was on the table when I entered the medical room. I climbed onto the table and sat next to her. 'Padme wake up.. Padme.. Don't leave me…' I said softly as if I could coax her to return to life. I held her hand to my cheek. 'Please Padme…' I said softly as I rested my head on her chest. I cried my eyes out I couldn't bare the thought of losing the only person who treated me so kindly.

Master Obi Wan lifted me from the table and carried me off into the hall and sat me down. He seemed as upset as I was. "She had twins… Both are healthy and look just like her…and Anakin.." He said softly as he stroked my hair. I would have told him that his attempts were in vain. I believe He saw Padme comfort me on more then one occasion in this fashion.

I looked at him tears still streaming down my face. 'A boy and a girl.. I can feel them.. Both strong… Tell me what did she name them… What were her last words.. How did she leave me?' I said in between sobs. He told me the responses to all my questions. "And She seemed to have died from a broken heart.. Luke will go with the Owens' and Leia will go with Bail." He said as he noticed me shift in my spot.

'Master Where will I go?' I asked as I pulled myself to my feet. 'Home is lost.. I have no family.. Where will I go?' I repeated. He looked at me calmly as if waiting for me to relax once again. "You will go to Naboo… You will continue your training… even if it isn't as proper like it once was." He said softly.

The day after our talk was Lady Padme's funeral. We arrived on Naboo on a rainy day her preparations were done on the ship. Obi Wan had left and so had Bail. Master Yoda had went into exile as I remained in company of Dorme. I visited with Padme the entire night before. Still trying to get her to return. I met her children they were sweet and wonderful. I told them farewell…and promised to find them once they were older.

I was alone that day when I got off the ship. Many of the others went to get dressed for the ceremony. Padme's Sister Sola came for me and took me for a fitting. I felt weird when they dressed me in what looked like something Padme wore once. They did my hair and painted my face as they got me ready to follow after her. I was the most closest to her So I was to be by her side and push her case into the lake.

I was silent during the entire thing I felt as if I'd join her if I said something soon. Then when the ceremony drew closer to an end… I felt my courage return. 'my friend My family.. You will live on inside my heart… I will live your Life for you now. I promise you I'll be strong.' I said loudly as I pushed her case into the calm serine lake. The others watched me as I began to walk away. My eyes stung from the tears forming once again.

And So ended my first chapter of many I have lived . I went With Sola to meet Mr. And Mrs. Neberrie whom took me in as a replacement of there daughter. My mentor my Family My Friend. I knew I'd never be able to fill the spot of there perfect child.

I knew that this would be another of the many families I'd lose in the nearing future. I could feel it in my heart as I sat down with them ate with them and laughed with them.

My heart would just have to learn to deal with the pain I would face.

(End of Chapter One)


	2. Chapter 2

**Lost Soul of a Survivor**

**By: Carissa Tovar**

**Chapter Two: A Galaxy's Wake**

**I can talk to you about the final moments of the ceremony with out shedding a tear now. You may consider my behavior extremely childish since I pined three months after Her death. She was all I truly had in this life other then the small astro droid R2-D2 that she left me. I lost everything that night Padme died , my friends and make shift family were slaughtered either in the confines of the Jedi temple or on distant planets alone and frightened. **

**But now it is time for me to continue my tale since I wish for someone else to know the truth about how a lost soul was forced to carry on.**

_**After what seemed like years turned out to only be a few months after Lady Padme's passing. The Neberrie' house hold was warm and caring that I almost believed I belonged to them. Master Obi Wan returned to Naboo about four months after the ceremony .**_

_**I was roaming the grounds in a white dress that Sola had made for me. My hair had grew afew inches and was up in a pony tail. I nearly ran to hug him when I sensed his presence. 'Obi Wan!!' I shouted as I flung myself at him. He smiled weakly at me and returned the gesture. "How are you Padme?" He asked as he let me go and dropped to the ground in front of me. 'Fine thank you for asking me master.' I replied as I smiled at him. **_

_**After a quick chat my master taught me everything he could in only a short span of eight months. I had completed every challenge… Did every task.. And now I stood in front of Sola and Obi Wan as a master. My saber's color was that of Padme's soul… pure white full of hope and life. R2 stood next to me as I watched Obi Wan in abit of confusion. "I must return to my hiding …I'll be on Tatooine.. Visit the Lars.. And ask them for directions to Ben's ok. That is if you want to see me.." He said with a small smile as he jumped into his ship and flew off.**_

_**I watched my Master leave as I waved him off R2 beeped as I walked to my ship. It was a last gift from Padme. Her silver Naboo Senator Cruiser glistened as we approached it. I Let R2 board the ship first as I ran back to hug Sola good bye. After that I boarded it closing the hatch as I heaved my bag to the chair. All I had in my possession were a few thousand credits, droid components, clothing, rations, a light saber, and a bag that we have no idea how it manages to carry things till this day due to the fact of how old it is. I also had Padme's pendent around my neck it hung from a silver chain it was one of the few things I had of Padme's. I twirled a strand of my chestnut colored hair as I sat myself in the drivers seat. R2 started the ship as I closed my eyes a frown was on my face as I felt myself drift into a sleep. **_

_**R2 and I traveled for several months my thirteenth birthday wasn't that much farther away. R2-D2 and I stopped at one of the Bestine Stations. We went in I was dressed as a normal citizen and we looked at some of the shops R2 believed it was time for me to get a break. It didn't last that long. There was an emergency holo cast that struck to home for both me and the droid. "Just in Naboo has been destroyed it just occurred only hours ago. From our sources it seems none of the citizens had a chance to escape. The planet has been destroyed by something called the Death star…"Said a Twikle Alien that vanished from the cast and was replaced by a storm trooper. "I'm sorry but it seems this attack was done by rebel forces."**_

_**I glared at the screen as i began to walk back to my ship. 'Lets go R2 we need to find a way to get the Rebel Alliance to listen to us.' I said softly as I walked up the ramp onto the ship. R2 beeped at me to check my messages which i did. "Padme.. I have a mission for you if you want to help us." I watched as the recorded image of Bail Organa spoke. "I need you to retrieve the tactical plans of the Empire. It seems there hiding them on one of Jabba's Slave Ships. If you can get those and give them to Ben I'd be grateful."**_

_**R2 repeated the message from Bail several times for me. I was somewhat lost I knew for a fact that the Hutt had a few hundred Slave Ships. Bail wasn't being specific when he had left the message. Just before I was about to call Bail he called me back. "Padme come in… Please Padme.." He said urgently as if thinking I didn't want to answer. **_

_**I turned on my com hoping he'd see me just fine..' Yes Bail.. I'll complete your mission but can you at least narrow my search to at least three to five ships..' I said calmly as I watched a smile form on his face. "You know I can do much better… I'll give you the ships coordinates ... its serial number , and a contact on the ship." He said as he smiled. I watched him then smiled yup Bail was a great man to go through all this just to make me feel better. **_

_**My little droid beeped as we neared the Harbinger.. Jabba's elite slave ship that now carried tactics for the Empire. We had traveled from the Braxtan Sector to the Mayagil Sector. That was a cross galaxy trip. The Ship was headed to Asmeru a small plantation planet that enjoyed having slaves. We reached the planet before the Harbinger arrived so we could find a way to sneak in. **_

_**It turns out that Bail had it planned out. A elderly Man by the name Janter.. Was lending us his ship to retrieve his newly bought slave. He was feeling Ill and had said he wished for his daughter to go retrieve the slave in his place…. He didn't have a daughter… He was going to send me for this slave I was to act as if I was making small talk and misplace my Droid. It would have worked fine… up until the part were we get on the ship and don't have any credits left. **_

_**R2 was taken away right when we landed into the harbinger's landing bay. It was the worse half a day of my life. I kept feeling as if some one I knew was here somewhere. I was grateful that the slave ship tales were partially true… they didn't have that many guards.. Only about five or ten of them. **_

_**I knew I felt someone I closed my eyes as I was forced to walk all the way to the bridge to ask if I was allowed to borrow some fuel. And then on our walk I saw her… Dorme was here. Her face wasn't as cheery as it once was.. It was lined and seemed tired. R2 would be waiting for me at the ship once I finished some of this business first. **_

_**Dorme turned slowly to look at me as I walked past her. Her eyes shined with a hope that seemed to have vanished since her capture. I couldn't just leave her here. I turned over to the man escorting me to their captain. 'That woman.. How much do you want for her?' I asked quickly trying to cover up my happiness of finding someone. **_

_**The man looked at her then back at me. "Twenty. Twenty Thousand Credits." He said dully as A frown formed on my face. I was already here to pick up one slave… Though He wasn't really a slave. He was Janter's son.. He was captured and put into slavery. I nearly sighed when he told me the price for Dorme. Then a thought came to mind. I waved my hand gently in front of the man's face. 'You will give her to me since I've made a previous purchase. You will have them both in my ship ready to leave…'I began.**_

_**I then stopped. Most of these people didn't belong here they all had families. 'On second thought you will gather all your men into the bridge for a chat.' I said as the man walked off. Leaving me alone. Dorme looked at me again. "Padme?" She said softly as she stroked my cheek. "Its you.. You've grown so much…"She said as she pulled me into a hug. **_

_**My heart skipped as I felt better. Here was someone who loved me…I was safe. I had told her to get her things to my ship and to search for Jamper's son. I took off towards the bridge as if I didn't have anything up my sleeve. The slave traders and the guards seemed bigger and stronger then me. They were very muscular and brawny. They felt like rancors… Evil monsters that raped as they ate there victims. **_

_**They glared at me. Well who wouldn't I was a thirteen year old girl in a ship full of thirty or forty year olds. 'I want you to let them go.' I said as I walked closer to them. They began to laugh and mumbled something that sounded like as if we should listen to a child. I frowned so they wouldn't take me seriously. One of the traders had called in one of there slaves he dragged her in by a chain that was tied around her neck. I nearly cried when I recognized who it was. Sola's eldest daughter had also survived. **_

_**She seemed frail and looked as if she were with child. She wasn't that much older than me. That man looked at her as if plotting about what other horrible thing to do to her. I clenched my fist as I looked away. 'What did you do to her?' I asked softly as I neared the man. "I had my way with her." He said smugly. She seemed to recognize my voice as she watched me. He struck her hard across the face. "Girl you will only think of me." He snapped at her as she nodded in silence. **_

_**I was angry. No one was allowed to hurt the people I knew. I couldn't control my body after that. I knew my hand connected with his face. The others trying to take me down. I remember screaming and kicking. Then I remember blood. Lots of blood. I badly injured all the men as I called R2 on my com link. 'R2 land us please.. I want to get out of here.' I said softly as I sank to the ground. I felt drained. Sola's daughter was named Mihori. That girl looked at me then checked if I was injured. All I had were a few scratches and a bump on the head but I'd be fine. **_

_**When the ship landed R2 returned to me tactics memorized and ready for delivery. The many slaves on the ship were overjoyed when I told them they would be free to go. Dorme ,Mihori ,and Jamper's son walked out of the ship with me. I hugged them all good bye and promised Dorme I'd visit her one of these years and told them all to be well. I had to get going since I had a round to make.**_

_**It didn't take us long to get to Tatooine R2 seemed abit better since I was smiling. I had dorme.. And Mihori around.. I had the twins.. And Obi wan. I still had a family. I nearly began to sing my victory when I jumped out of the ship and took a speeder to the Lars home. R2 beeped cheerfully as if my great mood were a force send. **_

_**I knocked on there door several times as I waited calmly against the wall. Mrs. Lars opened the door slowly as a tiny tot stood against the inside wall. "Padme.. Its nice to see you. How have you been?" She asked sweetly motioning for me to come in. "Owen is out trying to fix the duster again. He doesn't have your gift." She said smiling. I blushed at the complement. "Luke… How are you?' I asked as I picked him up. He didn't scream or cry he just smiled that tiny toothed grin. **_

_**My heart felt like it would burst with joy. 'Do you know how to get to Ben's?' I asked as I rocked Luke gently from side to side. The small boy seemed to enjoy the attention as he began to laugh. The woman smiled at me as she began to write down directions for me. 'Can I take Luke with me for a bit?' I asked hopefully. She nodded and said it would be nice to have a baby sitter for a bit. So with Luke in my arms I walked back to the speeder. I strapped him in as R2 beeped non sense to keep the boy entertained. **_

_**By the time we reached Obi Wan's It was starting to get dark. I knocked at his door Luke fast asleep in my arms as R2 beeped loudly. I rolled my eyes at the small droid as I waited for Master Obi Wan to open. "Who's there? I'm not going to buy anything from you Jawas." He mumbled as he opened up the door and looked wide eyed. "Padme? Luke?" he said softly as he hugged me. I nearly dropped the boy due to shock. **_

'_**Master I have the plans Bail wanted me to send for you. I missed you' I said softly as I felt tears well up in my eyes. Obi Wan just looked at me with a smile. Some tears were forming in his eyes too. He shuffled us into his home. It seems he was passing off as a hermit. I told him about everything that had happened. I had a lot to tell. **_

_**I didn't leave out anything about my life since the day I left naboo. I kind of blew up several Empires cruisers… By accident I seem to push a very bad button each time I meet up with the empire. R2 normally enjoys me helping the republic that he starts whirling when I have an accident like that. **_

_**Obi wan smiled and frowned during several parts of my story. I let out a soft sigh as I rocked Luke gently. 'But the good thing is we all are alive and well.' I said happily. Luke cooed softly as I sat him down. "Well I want you two stay here for the night the Tuskin Raiders are out now.. I don't want to risk you getting into trouble." He said happily to open his home to us.**_

_**I nodded in agreement as R2 gave Obi wan a disk of the tactics. "So Bail truly sent you… I am both shocked and proud." He said calmly. I slept on the ground next to Luke in the living room. R2 was next to one of the seats as he shut himself down for the night. The small boy moved little as he slept. I smiled as I snuggled into the blankets I felt safe being near Obi Wan. **_

_**I woke up early the next morning being silent as possible as to not wake Luke. Obi wan was up early too. I could tell he was nervous. "He looks so much like the both of them…"He said softly as I stood next to him and looked out the window with him. 'Yep he does…' I said softly as R2 beeped waking Luke with his noises. Luke sat up and looked at me. His eyes were sad as if knowing I was going to leave him soon. "Padme… You going away?" He asked as I turned to face him. Obi Wan looked upset but he knew I had to keep moving to think of a way to save everyone. **_

'_**I have too. You both should know that…But I'll visit you guys every few months.. That and I'll send a holo for you each week.' I said softly as I picked the boy up. 'we have to get going.. I just came to drop everything off. And spend time with Luke… And you Master.' I said quickly as I began to walk out. **_

_**I strapped the boy into the speeder once again as I waved good bye to Obi Wan. "May the force be with you Padme." He said softly as he hugged me good bye and Patted Luke on the head. "I shall see you soon young one." He said softly as I began to drive off. I knew I'd see Luke again. I just wasn't as sure about Obi Wan. **_

_**And so I drove Luke back to the Lars household. I nearly had to pry him from the speeder. "Come on Love.. I'll be back in a few weeks..' I said as I pried him off. He gave me the puppy pout as I watched him. **_

_**I waved good bye and was off. Who truly knew when I'd return. **_

_**And Now ends another part of my life where a small glimmer of hope began to sprout into my heart.**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Lost Soul of a Survivor**_

_****_

By: Airashii

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. I do however own this story and the Original Charaters within it. Please read and review.

_**Chapter 3: When Paths Cross**_

_**Time feels as if it rushes like the waterfalls of Naboo. But then It feels as if it doesn't move quickly like some of the frozen planets of the outer rim. I've seen many things in my life. At times I think that I have seen everything. I've heard so many rumors it not even funny it confuses me really. **_

_**I've heard of a man named Vader. He was the one that killed my friends. He's the one that killed Anakin. Which in turn killed Padme. **_

**I don't remember the last time I visited Leia. I think it was about a year before last since I was getting myself ready to see her once again. Bail Organa had organized a small party for me which was funny since I nearly forgot about my own birthday. **

**It would be my fifteenth birthday.. Five years since Padme's death. I let out a sigh as I sat closer to the window. Dorme had decided to join me this month she wanted to catch a glimpse of Leia. **

**I was happy to have the company and she felt the same way too. We were landing on Alderran Bail's and Leia's home planet. Once we landed we were greeted by Bail. He was over joyed to see us both. He wasn't alone he was being escorted by a boy, he seemed two years older than me. He had the most beautiful blue grey eyes and sandy blonde hair. **

**He helped Dorme with her things as we all followed behind Bail. Dorme, Artoo and I walked closely behind him. We were abit tired and confused on why out of all these years a party. "Its perfect timing for you three to arrive. Leia has begun to forget your last visit." Bail told us sadly. "She wants you to stay this time.." he added as I rubbed the back of my head. **

**The boy behind him looked at me then away from me quickly. I shrugged it off. "Hayden don't be quiet boy. Speak these ladies won't harm you…"Bail began as he elbowed him into a few words. **

"**I… I Umm… Rather not master Bail. May I wait till later once I know I'm ready." He said in a soft warm voice. He continued to walk it seemed he wasn't very focused since the poor guy fell. I was about to warn him but it was too late. Oops. I nearly giggled at the sight I bent down to lend him a hand up but he looked away and got up on his own. Bail shook his head and continued. **

**My poor Hayden. Once we arrived to the home of Bail Organa a young five year old girl came racing down the hall. "PADME!!" She screeched as she nearly threw herself at me but jumped instead into my arms. 'EEP!!' Was the sound that left my lips as we flew backwards onto an unsuspecting Hayden. Luckily he cushioned our fall. I believed I injured him. Poor poor Hayden.**

**I lifted Leia from the ground as I too stood up. I once again offered Hayden a hand up but he refused. I had no time to ask him why he continued to refuse me. 'How Are you?' I asked Leia sweetly as she hugged me tightly. "Your not going anywhere.. Anymore." She ordered. I simply rolled my eyes as I patted her head. 'I always have a good reason to go and return… You know that.' I told her softly. **

**I was then lead off to the small crowd of friends as Leia continued to press reasons for me to stay. All very good but I came up with a better excuse to go. Hayden watched me from a distance during the small party. I was nearly over whelmed by gifts and luck trinkets. 'I can only take so much.' I said softly as I looked at some of the fine clothing they gave me. Some of it I would feel strange in. **

**The Jampor snippet felt strange around my neck. I have been wearing it for five years and it still felt off to me. Hayden looked at me as I escaped the guests trying to convince me to stay. Jar Jar was there I nearly felt my anger rise. I knew it was he that gave Palpitine the power he desired. It was him that I blamed or tried too anyway. **

**I finally escaped as I hid behind one of the pillars. I sank to the ground and drew up my legs. I could feel my heart rip to pieces. Padme should be here! Anakin Should be with her! They both should be alive!! I felt my mind shout. And then when those thoughts left me Hayden appeared with a small gift in his hand as he sat next to me. "I heard the rumors about you.. I hear you were the friend of the great Jedi and Senator that tried to stop this senseless war." He whispered as He handed me the gift. It fit in the palm of my hand as I smiled weakly at him. 'Why do you speak to me now? Why did you refuse my help?' I asked him as I looked at the small charm in my hand. **

"**You will know in time.. Angel that shines the light of hope on those who have gotten lost in the darkness." He whispered softly. I felt my face grow warm and looked away. 'Thank you..' I said softly as I placed it on the chain with the snippet. "May our paths cross again my Lady. I wish to see your smile.. Since it brings joy to my heart." He said as he got up and left. **

**I sat there in a daze. Did he just? Did he just say I was an Angel? I wounderd. I shrugged it off as I knew it was time to go once again. I did my farewells once again as I left Dorme here. It was time for me to go on my own for abit. Artoo waited peacefully on the ship he was whooting happily since he got repaired and cleaned. **

**I had to make another promise before I was allowed to leave. I could feel something calling me through the force. I tried to shake it off during the next week but failed. What in force would be waiting for me on Dagobeh. R2 punched in the coordinates and we moved closer to the planet. **

**Luckily for us we were drawing closer to it anyway. We were going to visit the remains of my beloved Naboo hoping to catch a glimpse of hope and light. We landed the ship onto the swampy land as I felt the emptiness in the ship's bridge.**

**No Dorme. I made her stay on Alderran I told her I needed some time alone. I fiddled with the chain around my neck both charms clanked together. I let out a soft sigh of frustration. I prepared myself as I neared the ship's exit with the saber at my side as I walked out. That was when I felt it. The familiar presence near by. 'Yoda?' I called out into the damp night air. It was cold and dark. I could feel the hairs on my neck stand on end.**

**I crept farther into the swamp lands searching for master Yoda. I was beginning to feel the chills from the air since my clothes were drenched by the nights hard rain. My breath looked like fog when I exhaled. 'Yoda' I called out once again. No response. I continued on walking and it seemed I reached the heart of the swamp lands. At the heart lay a small home. **

**I crept closer as I peered through the crusted old window. I smiled as I watched yoda sitting on an old beat up chair in front of a warm roaring fire. I must have been a sight to see since I was drenched. He smiled and motioned for me to enter. **

"**Mmm .. Padme expecting you I was…"He said softly as he motioned for me to sit down. "Much training ahead for you.. Very good in dealing against the dark side you will be." He added. **

**I did what I was told. For the next few days…or rather months I learned all seven of the light saber forms. At times I felt my blisters or bruises had some of there own. I trained in the rain… and in the scorching heat of the two suns of that planet. There were moments I wanted to quit and let despair contaminate my heart. **

**When I slept in the ship I was overwhelmed by bad dreams. Nightmares of Lady Padme's Suffering. I caught glimpses of her pain. I felt her final moments. Those moments were like daggers through my heart. **

**For me those four months on Dagobeh were difficult yet they were the most rewarding. I felt as if the blood, sweat, and tears I shed were finally catching up to me. I felt numb to the heat and the cold during the second month there. I ate Little and focused most of my energy on my training. I still kept my promise as I sent a holo to Luke, Leia, Obi Wan, and Dorme every few days. **

**One night scared me or did it comfort me? It probably did both. In this dream I felt a gentle caress on my cheek as I opened my eyes only to stare into deep blue orbs. I felt safe for that moment as I felt my muscles relax. Then it changed in a blink of an eye those same eyes were full of rage and hatred. My air was cut off as I gasped for breath. I felt as if I was moved away from those eyes by something that made me feel safe. I turned and faced those blue gray eyes that reassured me I'd be safe. **

**I woke up the next morning tired and confused. This was my last day on Dagobeh I took my time walking back to yoda trying to clear my mind from my troubled night mare. By the time I returned to my master I was a bit muddy from falling or slipping in the swap lands. Once I saw master Yoda I bowed and smiled. 'I must leave again.' I said softly as I stood up once again. **

"**Don't let your heart turn cold for you will be tempted by the dark side to hate." Were the last words I heard from master Yoda as I played them over and over in my head as I got back to the ship. Once there I stretched and heard the bones in my back crack. I knew I was tired r2 started the ship and we left the swamp planet. I laid down on the soft mattress and closed my eyes. I knew both pairs of eyes from the dream. **

**The first pair were those of master Anakin. The second pair were those of Onasi. I knew it must have been a strange feeling but I believe Skywalker is alive and well. I don't know how but it's a feeling in my heart that tells me he lives.**

**I guess it was time for me to relax. After four months of training and horrible dreams it was high time for me to visit my favorite kid. And I bet Luke missed me anyway. What was his last holo of me looking ragged or of my looking stronger yet upset? I sat up and pried myself from the bed and went to visit R2. I made sure he was in tip top shape. Since I did his maintenance of course my little droid would always be top of the line. I cleaned him up and then went back to the bed and relaxed. **

**But the things I saw in this slumber were things I wish I could easily forget. Images that caused me to panic or fret upon. No matter I shall deal with it all when the time comes. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Lost Soul of a Survivor**

****

By: Airashii

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. I do however own this story and the Original Charaters within it. Please read and review.

**Chapter 4: Trapped **

**Nearly three years have passed since my last meeting with Dorme. I've been a tad bit busy trying my best to aid the republic in there effort to destroy the Empire. I haven't had any time to lead the normal life of an eighteen year old female. It doesn't really bother me anyway. I've been on missions since I got back. They thought five months without really doing anything in the effort nowadays is considered a vacation. So far I've been all over the galaxy only to cause the empire some un welcomed trouble that they deserve. So far my resume shows that I have destroyed imperial fighters, intercepted valuable information, hunted down several bounty hunters, and forced in some time to spend with my family. I have to make random visits to the twins during what little free time I'm allowed. **

**I've visited the Wookie planet of Kashyyyk on more than one occasion. Its been dubbed one of my hang outs. The two other planets that I frequent are Tatooine and Alderran. But anyways… I guess its time form me to explain why I brought up Dorme in the beginning. The last time I spoke to her was just last year near the twins' day of birth. So far Dorme has been fine and happy to be back home with her husband and children since I brought her back. Her youngest son Derek is my god child adorable little boy. I guess I was replacing Padme. I was the twins' mysterious guardian that visited them when ever I had time off. Anyway… I was about to tell you that my heart felt a pang of pain as I neared the planet. Something was wrong and I needed to know why. And so I land here on Aleen. **

_**Dorme's Tale**_

_**I worked for a queen who became my best friend. I was a handmaiden. She didn't care if we came from different classes she only saw the good in a person's soul. As a handmaiden you were trained to give your life to save the one you are in charge of protecting. I was with this lady since she was only nine years old. She was the youngest queen of Naboo. I was proud to do what I could to keep her safe. A year after she became senator I fell in love with the head of security captain Typhoon. Lady Padme learned of my secret and hinted me to go out and enjoy my time. A year after that encouragement I was married to him and had my first child a few months after. I have three children the eldest Rena, the middle Aaron, and the youngest one named Derek. I was only gone a few weeks after Derek's birth but during those few days I was gone it seemed like my lady was battling against someone she couldn't win against. Padme and Anakin have been married since the clone wars began. It felt like they were having a falling out since he seemed more distant than normal. **_

_**That man went to the dark side a place the lady choose not to follow him. He was not her husband when he choose the sith over happiness. My lady died not long after he choose his path leaving behind a child she raised as hers and her newborn twins. It was harder for Miss Star to cope with it all. They were so close you could tell that she had to deal with a great pain. No one knew how to explain to her that Anakin turned and killed Padme. **_

_**I was returning home from the market. My husband took Rena and Derek with him to the capital to pick up a new house droid. That left Aaron alone at home waiting for my return. I smiled to myself as I walked home my life was great. Especially since I was returned home to my family by a good friend of mine. Now we were getting ready to welcome Miss Star with a small celebration. My children are very fond of her. They made sure I remembered to have something ready for her for when she arrived. My how time flys when one thinks. I knocked on the door to let Aaron know I was home as I quickly opened the door and went in. I rested all the bags on the counter as I sensed something was wrong. "Aaron honey… Are you home?" I called softly as I lifted up a pair of my old melee daggers from the kitechen drawer. **_

_**I crept up stairs to check his room. No one it was empty. I crept silently into the next room I walked towards the bed and lifted one of the covers to check under it. I turned around quickly when I heared the door slam behind me. A man in emperial armor stood there as the door opened once more and then walked in a man in all black with my son in his arms. I could see the fear shine in my little boy's eyes as I felt the life being choked from me. I cluthed my throat hoping for someway to breath again. I was lifted into the air by the force since no one was holding me. Tears filled my eyes as screams left my throat I thrashed hoping to get out of his grasp. **_

_**The man in black stroked my son's hair as he looked at me and let me fall and crupmle to the ground. "Dorme are you losing your skills? It would be abit sad to see your son die cause you had not done anything to prevent it." He said softly as Aaron shuddered. He let Aaron fall to the ground. My boy tried to crawl to me but was lifted into the air. "Let him go.. Please what do you want with me?" I begged he let my boy go as he fell to the ground once more. "Where is Padme?" He asked coldly. I looked at him confused. "Which Padme? Lady Amidalla died only Miss Star remains." I said calmly as I drew my boy to me. "You Lie! She lives I've seen her she works for the republic!!" He snapped out. "I want my wife to return home and your going to help me!" He hissed out. I was frozen with fear. "Anakin?!" I said shakily. This wasn't happening. "Anakin.. Is dead… Only Vader lives. Dorme you'll help me find her." He said as I watched him rip my son from my arms. **_

_**He lifted my son into the air and crushed the life out of him. I cried as I watched the life fade from his eyes as I glared at him. "My baby!! How could you! You monster!!"I shouted as I stood up and attacked him. He caught hold of me and laughed. "You Sith!!" I screamed as he dragged me out of my home. And then I was gone. I was captured. My beloved son lost. Murdered before my very eyes. What would my husband say when he saw our Aaron on the ground? What would he do?! Vader watched his men chain me up to the wall. I didn't struggle. For what?! He could easily kill me like he killed my son. I hung there limply as I sobbed softly. "Look at me I have some questions…" He said coldly. I looked up slowly and in his palm was a small hologram of Miss Star. "She's alive dorme so don't lie to me…" He whispered as he neared me and removed his mask. He looked the same except for his face was cold. "Why is she hiding from me?!" He said angrily. "That's not your wife! Your wife Padme died eight years ago. That's just Miss Star! Miss Padme Star she was left alone and she tries to save everyone like her Lady!"I snapped out. I felt drained. "What do you mean?!"He said angily. "That's little Star?"He asked calmly. He seemed confused. "Why do you need me now?" I said whimpering. "She loves everyone doesn't she.." He said with a smirk. My eyes widened a bit with horror. He was going to use me as bait. Oh Miss Padme what have I done!**_

_**Padme Star's POV**_

_**I stretched in my seat. Finally, we were going to visit Dorme I was going to see my god children. We landed in the capital city as I stood up R2 whirled happily as he neared the exit. ' Lets go and behave.' I warned him. We exited and were attacked by Rena and Derek. "Padme!! What did you bring for us?" Asked the ten year old girl. I Shrugged and looked in my pockets. 'Oh yeah… Here is something for the two of you.' I said giving each of them a teal colored crystal. I was attacked by another hug. 'Ok kids let me go please we need to go so we can see your mom. I want to see Aaron you two know how much fun I have debating.' I said cheerfully. Carth rolled his eyes as we walked towards the land speeder. "It won't take us long to get home. So relax… Dorme is probably resting and Aaron is probably next door." He said happily. R2 beeped as I leaned against him. 'A nice nap before we get there will do me well.' I mumbled softly as I drifted off. **_

_**Derek poked me to wake up. I opened an eye as I noted it was dark and felt like it was evening. I sat up and smiled. 'There's something wrong…'I mumbled softly as I stood up. Carth raised an eye brow. "How so?" he asked as I got out. 'something very evil came to your home and took Dorme…' I mumbled as I lead him to the house. I told the kids to stay in the speeder. My weapon gleamed in my hand as we walked up the stairs and into the open room. "My boy!" He said sadly as he dropped to the ground. "My boy!!" He sobbed clutching the lifeless body of Aaron. I nearly cried at the sight. 'Oh Aaron…How could the force do this?' I said aloud as I noted the small holo log on the table. I pushed the button as it played a message. "To retrieve your beloved Dorme come to me and face me young Star." Said a cold voice. **_

_**This couldn't be happening I thought death was over. I thought my loved ones were safe. This man Vader Killed Padme and That same man killed Aaron.. I need to find him… I need to hurt him.. But hurting isn't the way of the Jedi I can't be heartless like him. I need to return Dorme to her family they need her more then ever. I walked out of the home and took off on foot to where I would have expected the worse scum of the planet to hang out at. I thought it was a suitable place for Vader. He wasn't there when I asked questions and searched for him. It must have been strange for a female that looked of high standings being alone in the scum side of town. I was in one of my birthday gowns that Bail had bough for me. It was white dress that was cut above my knees I had a pair of white boots to match this out fit. I loved this dress because it only had one sleeve but it was a beautiful one. I continued to walk as a small sound began to come from my com link. I pressed the button on my wrist as I looked at the image of the tiny terrified boy. "Padme… The mean men came back and took daddy and Rena…I was hiding and they didn't find me… Come back and protect me…"He said before erupting in sobs. As quickly as I left there home I returned the only difference was I was running. Running and praying that they wouldn't go back and take him. **_

_**Praying they didn't do anything to the house before I got back. Once I got back I ran right into the house. The little boy came flying out of the closet he was hiding in. "Padme…"He screamed before his tears began to pour out. I held Derek in my arms as I tried with all my might to calm him. 'Shhh… It will be alright…I promise.' I whispered as I calmed him. I made him a cup of tea as I pulled out my com link and called up a familiar person. "Bail Organa Speaking.." He began as he looked at Padme in confusion. 'I need you to do me a favor… If I can free Dorme and her family will you take them and hide them from Vader… I've done so much and I don't want them to get hurt..' She reasoned and after about ten minuets of debate He agreed. There were some of his troops on Aleen anyway so She ordered him to send afew to follow her. **_

'_**Derek Honey go get some things ready. Mister Bail has been nice and is sending a group of his troops to take you and your family far away from that mean man.' She said as she pulled a bag from the closet and tossed things into it that would be useful. As I finished I noticed I should close the bag but there wasn't any rubber band in sight. I pulled out my ponytail and tied the bag up and began to walk out of the house holding Derek's hand as I lead him over to the large land speeder. I threw the bag in the back as I held Derek closely. The ship reached a hidden Landing dock. I let the boy go as I kissed his forehead good bye. 'Be good…I love you..' I added as I began to walk into the landing Dock. I kept my light saber strapped to my thigh so no one would suspect. My Blaster was on the other hand on my hip daring someone to mess with me. As I walked my hair began to cover my left eye. **_

_**I could feel it sway behind me. I closed my eyes and I could see Padme do this…The real Padme. By the time I reached the steel door I had calmed myself and was ready to face the evil that caused so many to suffer. Once my foot struck the ground in front of the steel it slid open only to reveal darkness. I walked in and the doors closed quickly behind me. I turned to look back and the lights turned on. It was bright. To the center was a huge chair that looked like a throne with Vader sitting proudly on it. I looked to my left and saw them all hanging from the wall. There arms bound them there as they looked down. They were prisoners of this stupid war. This war that this jerk started. He watched me with all his interest and released Dorme from her binds. She tried to undo the binds of her daughter and husband but HE forced her away from them. Vader sent Dorme flying towards me. I used the force to aid her and slow her flying body and rest it on the ground. 'Dorme… Are you ok?' I asked as I helped her from the ground. **_

"_**You Must choose Dorme.. You can only have one…"He said evilly as he turned his attention to Dorme. My heart sank. You could never force a woman to choose between her husband or her child. But this thing did. Dorme tried to deiced as she began to cry. She went thorough a lot of emotional stress earlier and this wasn't helping. Her husband glared over at Vader as he screamed for her to take there child. "Take Her…Rena Can live Life.. I'm old You'll find another husband.. You can replace me.. Not Our child.." He yelled as Vader Released their child. 'Run… I'll deal with all of this.. Hurry..' I screamed as I watched the two leave the room. I waited for the com link to beep. The beep finally came and I knew they'd be safe. They were gone. **_

_**Vader freed Carth. I was confused for the moment and then I watched him kill him. I sank to the ground tears flooding my vision. 'You jerk..' I whimpered in between sobs. Vader stood from his spot and raised me to my feet through the force. He drew me to him. 'Let me go..' I yelled as I looked away from him. He removed his mask as He forced me there. He took my chin in his hands and made me look him in the eye. "Padme…" He whispered as he neared as if to kiss me. 'NO!!' I screamed as I pushed myself away from him. I flew back and hit myself against the wall. "You defy me Wife?" He asked as he drew closer. Fear flooded my veins as I tried to escape. 'I'm not your wife Anakin.. I'm Star.. Padme's friend..' I screamed hopping it would sink in. It didn't and he tried once again. He held my face close to his as he ran a hand through my hair. **_

_**I cried when he did it. I felt dirty.. I felt sick. **_

_**I felt wrong! This wasn't supposed to happen! I continued to scream at him and lashed at him with my hand hoping dearly that it connected with the side of his face. The room fell into a deep silence as he looked directly into my eyes. Mine red with tears and his watching me hungrily. I felt ill. 'I'm not the one you seek! She died and its all Your FAULT!' Snapped out. My heart felt as if it shattered and the pieces were lost for good. I could feel my self grow tired. I needed to get away. I was half tempted to tell him anything just to let me go. I wrenched my hand from him and ran. I wanted to escape anyway I could. My heart racing as I made it to a window. My eyes took in the sight outside. The cruel red hues of the sky clashed against the near black of a brewing storm. 'Why did you Leave Padme!!' I screamed when I felt him approach me. I kicked and screamed at him to go away. "Padme.. Quit lying to me.. Just come back.. I need you.. Please return by my side." He whispered as he pulled me into a tight hug. His lips mere inches away from mine. His hand snaked through my hair as I yelled at him to release me. Those electric blue orbs scared me. Tear ran down my face as I begged him to release me. 'Your wrong.. Your wrong!' Was all I managed to whimper out. He had my weapon.. He had the power to kill me.. He had even more power to destroy my life slowly. It was sad really I just wished I would die already. **_

_**His hand in my hair placed my lips to his. This stupid gesture was enough to make me wish I had the power to torment myself. His kiss was bruising as he waited for me to respond to his touch. I couldn't even though I could feel parts of me betray my mind. I finally recovered control of my body and grabbed him by the hair trying my best to pull him away. He bit my lip as I succeed and looked into his eyes that were full of rage. I blocked him from me as I tried to walk away he grabbed me by my hair and kept me close to him. "Your mine!" He hissed in to my ear I could feel it as if it burned. I was tossed to the ground and felt someone enter the room. A trooper then dragged me away and I felt weak as he watched me with hungry eyes. I could hear his voice in my head. "You will be mine… Padme." His eyes just followed as I lay there and felt my body move away. It took awhile as I nearly passed out before he opened the door to the cell. I ripped my hand from him as he kicked me into the cell. My backside had seen many better days as I could feel my back begin to bruise. My eyes felt as if they burn when kept open. I could feel all my body lose all its hope as I felt someone touch me gently. All I remember seeing is a pair of beautiful blue grey eyes that watched me with concern. And then I was gone for now. Only to wake later on.**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Lost Soul of a Survivor**_

_****_

By: Airashii

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. I do however own this story and the Original Charaters within it. Please read and review.

_**Chapter 5 : The Knight's Tale**_

_**The galaxy was spinning out of control everything I believed in was either a lie or lost to me. Blue Grey orbs watched me with concern and then I was gone. My pain filled my mind once my eyes closed. How could I? But why did Anakin do that? I felt disgusted and broken inside. Oh why did force do this? I could grow to hate but I don't want to lose my soul. I had a mission and now I must do what I can. But first I must rest.**_

_**--Hayden's Point of View--**_

_**Her eyes were shut tightly I could remember the way her eyes looked. They were of fear and disgust with herself. So blurred with self hatred that they couldn't even see me. I lifted her still form and placed it near the wall.. Tonight will be a difficult one I could feel it. She seemed so delicate I was fearful to touch her. Her breaths came as those of people in deep sleep and I felt fear grow in my heart. What if she died in my care? Would I be able to live with myself? **_

_**--Padme--**_

_**A shiver ran down my spine as I awoke the next day. I noted the cloak wrapped tightly around my person and snuggled into it. It smelled vaguely familiar. I felt safe even if it was only for a moment. A figure sat propped against the wall near by. So this must be the owner of the cloak, He must have been keeping watch over me. The force aura that surrounded him reminded me of someone. I just didn't have any clue as to who.**_

_**I pulled the cloak off of me and carried it to drape it over him. I owed my life to this man that valued mine over his own. He looked so familiar just know I've met him before I just don't remember where. I gave up for a moment and sat next to him. I felt guilty beyond measure. How in Sith could I fail how could my body respond to that that creature?! The mornings sun still hadn't risen so I crept to the window in hopes to sneak a glance of the pink, red and orange hues of the morning sky. The heart in my chest sank as I was engulfed in an abyss of darkness. No hope or inspiration could be drawn from nothingness. **_

_**I turned around quickly when I heard someone stir behind me. My eyes widened a bit with shock yet a small smile tugged on my lips and I flung myself at him. 'Hayden! Your alive. Why are you here?' I asked him as I composed myself and released my hold on him to sit a reasonable distance from him. That cheerful smile on his face could melt any females heart in an instant. "Why were you upset in your sleep? Did he hurt you? Tell me Padme."**_

_**He said sternly as he watched me with that intense stare that made anyone feel uneasy. I frowned and fiddled with my sleeve as I looked at the ground. 'He's Anakin. Lady Padme's husband. My Lady's killer and the murder of my fellow Jedi. That spineless creature kissed me and my body betrayed me. How can I live with myself?! He killed a friend in front of me. I'm so shameful.' I nearly shouted as I felt warm tears roll down my face. I looked over at him his face looked serious and I nearly thought he looked cold.**_

_**My memories felt as if they were flashing before my eyes as I tried my best to block out recent events. Anakin was alive. Padme was gone the twins are in grave danger. Why did all this happen to me?! I shut my eyes as I tried my best to think I was scared and tired but I knew something was going to happen I just didn't know what. **_

_**I was startled as I realized Hayden was still staring at me. He wanted to speak and who was I to not allow him to tell his tale. So it was now my turn to focus on him and wait for him to begin.**_

_**+Hayden+**_

_**After watching the angel have a near mental break down I just noticed her stop in her triad as she stared at me intently. My heart felt as if it went up my throat. Once I cleared it I tried to think back since I guess it was now my turn to tell her my story. I ran my hand through my hair as I thought back. I bit my lip and then began. **_

"_**I was born on the planet Falleen.. Its not far from Naboo.. But anyways.. I was given to the Jedi directly after birth. I Never knew my parents at all. I was a Padawan under Master Mace Windu. Those were the best days of my life. My life was great before the war.. I trained hard and had fun at the temple I even recall a young girl watching me . Any way.. I was sent to Dantooine with a good friend of my master. His name was Cain. Nice man.. He was a bounty hunter and well if my master trusted him I would too. I bet anything Mace knew something was going to happen since I saw his spirit after his death once we got to Dantooine."**_

"_**All he said was that he was sorry and he hoped I would be fine and not to reveal to anyone that I am a Jedi. It was hard at first since I was raised that way… I learned I was great at hunting and became very good at it.. Then I set out early on a mission my comrades stayed at our base and when I returned… They were all dead.. The Empire beat me back.. And Cain was dead.. So I guess I wandered around on my own for several years and then I met Bail." **_

_**I paused as I tried my best to organize the rest of my memories. I stared at her eyes for abit and began once again. "I met him on one of my side missions and he had a great job for me… Told me to keep an eye on you. That and to try to take out Vader." I added as I watched her face turn a shade of pink. I continued on. "This was one of my failed attempts as you can tell.. "I added with a shrug. **_

_**I scooted closer to her I could feel the heat from her body. The warmth of her breath. I could sense the beat of her heart as I leaned closer to her. A slam nearly shattered all that I worked for. She sat up straight and nearly began to tear up as she watched the troops move towards her. That look in her eyes could have caused anyone's heart to bleed. I tried to grab for her hand anything really I wanted to drag her close to me make her feel safe but they stunned me before I even had a chance to fight for her. **_

_**I had to find a way to save my Padme. Anything to keep my angel from harm or worse… Anakin.**_

_**Padme**_

_**I knew my heart was doing something strange when I felt him move closer to me. In my mind I knew damn well that we might be the last of the Jedi.. That I knew our fates were aligned.. But then they had to come in before I had a chance to feel his lips against mine. Why did force do this to me?! **_

_**I was dragged away I don't want to know what is in store.. I want to escape.. Fade from existence… anything but see him once more… He was the cause of all my pain… But that look in his eyes that shined right before I lost consciousness… was a look I can recall him giving Lady Padme.**_

_**Oh force help me. **_

_**(To Be Continued)**_


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